GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
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