Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Randomize