I'll bet she douches with gravy.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
