What tipped you off? The sombrero?
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
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