that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
