I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Randomize
