can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Randomize
