your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize
