I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
His nipple licking is glorious
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