I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize
