Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Randomize
