is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize
