New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
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