I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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