And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
