I could have mohawked her pubes.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize
