Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
