it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Randomize
