? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Randomize
