why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
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