I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
Randomize
