I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
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