Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Randomize
