I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
Randomize
