you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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