Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
