your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
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