It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
On my way home I saw a car that had "MOVE OVER PLZ" emblazoned across the windshield backwards, so people could see it in their rearview mirror
If I ever drive for Lyft or Uber I'm definitely gonna do that
Randomize