I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Randomize