Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Your penis caused this!
Randomize
