He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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