Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
Randomize
