I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Randomize
