I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Randomize
