ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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