I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
The cabbie told me fat girls shouldn't wear tight clothes, and that he feels bad for the guys that have to be underneath them, especially because their positions are "very limited" and proceeded to ask me if I had a trash can and if I could throw something away for him. Don't worry though, he promised it wasn't anything "bad". He then handed me a tied up grocery bag with a bunch of wadded up Kleenex that weighed about 3 pounds. To answer your question, yes I made it home. Fml
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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