Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Randomize
