somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize
