It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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