I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
