I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
Randomize
