Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
meet me or not, i'm out of control
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
Randomize
