at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Randomize
