I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
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