We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
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