Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Randomize
