YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
