Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
You left your phone here
Wait...
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