I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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