I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
