Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
